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And somehow it’s now 2010…?

February 9, 2010

Is it really 2010 already? Have I seriously been married over 7 months now..? Wow. Time gets faster and faster as I get older.. It needs to slow down a little! (Or maybe stay fast until spring..and then slow down so I can enjoy the very few nice months we actually get here in Rochester!) You last heard from me in September.. So I better give you a quick recap of the past few months. (I can’t say they were very exciting though.. :) )

I’m now off of Coumadin/Warfarin (since the beginning of October) and I am SO glad I don’t have to take that poison anymore. I know…technically it helped me by keeping my blood thin enough for my body to break down the DVT (deep vein thrombosis or blood clot in my calf)..but it made me feel sooo sick. I was feeling nauseous on and off throughout the day and was losing a ton of hair. (Luckily I have pretty thick hair to begin with so it wasn’t visibly noticeable..despite literally combing out a handful or two every day.) I got my hair cut and colored a week or two after going off coumadin and my stylist could not believe the amount of hair she was combing off my head. It was crazy (and a little embarrassing..lol), but I explained it was from the meds I had been on and she understood. Now the only thing I take every day is my supplements (Prenatal multi, B6 & triple strength fish oil!). No, I’m not pregnant..but hope to be maybe sometime this year so the prenatals are just a preparation thing!

I’m trying to get back into working out on and off now but I’m trying not to be psychotic about it. I have a problem with almost becoming obsessed when I get into some kind kind of workout regiment and I am trying to avoid allowing myself to be that way. It becomes a chore and I hate how I start to think when I’m in that mode. The only way I can try to explain it is almost as if I was thinking like an anorexic but still eating. I’d make sure I ate between 1200-1800 calories on weekdays (and then eat what I want on weekends..fast food..ice cream, so yep NOT anorexic!) BUT when it came to exercise I’d NEED to make sure I did it at least Mon, Wed and Friday. That’s not a big deal I guess but I would have this voice in my head saying I had to do more than the last time, better than the last time…and if I missed a workout I’d really beat myself up over it. My workouts would end up lasting longer and longer (to the point where it probably wasn’t making a difference) but my mind insisted I still had to beat the last workout. Then I dread each workout and eventually feel so overwhelmed in my head that I stop working out altogether. (Ya…I’m slightly nutty. It’s my insecurity.. I never look in the mirror and feel happy about myself. There’s always something I can fix..always something that’s too big..Something that’s crooked..ACK!) I think that’s why I get that way..and my tendency to be a perfectionist about everything. (I’m a big list maker..It calms me..hehe!) When I was on coumadin I wasn’t even allowed to workout because the doctor made it sound like she was worried the clot that was there might break loose..so my working out since October hasn’t been as regular as it probably should be. Now I’m trying to just ease back into it. I’m doing whatever cardio sounds like it would be fun at the moment and I limit myself to only doing it for 35-45 minutes and then I switch to my strength training. I’m hoping if I keep up with making sure I don’t get into the obsessive mindset I’ll keep with it and enjoy it more. I really hope it works!

My business has continued to do very well for me so I am very happy with that. It slowed down a little bit when all the brides to be were focusing on the holidays but since January first it has been picking up like crazy and keeping me very busy. Between that and our tax return we were able to pay off my hospital bills from this summer, some of our credit cards and almost half of the new bedroom set/mattress we got in December. We got a new carpet for the master bedroom too..and pretty blue paint (Cosmos from Sherwin Williams..used in the living room of HGTV’s 2009 dream home!) I’ll share some pics in another post.. This one is already a bit winded!

Lastly I had a hard couple of weeks because I have been so busy and I’ve had to deal with the death of two my my little furbabies less than a week apart. My holland lop rabbit Tutter passed away on Tuesday, January 26th..completely unexpectedly at the age of 4 (he would have been 5 on Feb 28th). The Thursday before that we noticed he hadn’t ate all day when we were heading to bed so we rushed him to the Emergency Vet at midnight worried he possibly had gastric stasis which commonly leads to death. The woman there didn’t really know rabbits so she didn’t really know what she was doing. She guessed it might be stasis as well and put him on a med that was supposed to help get his digestive tract moving again. We couldn’t get an appointment with our regular vet until Tuesday so from Thursday on we focused on giving him tummy rubs, meds, syringing him water and tempting him with hay, carrots and banana. By Monday night he seemed to be improving..We were so excited because he had started munching on his hay here and there and was picking up his water drinking a lot. We brought him into the vet Tuesday morning and she worried it was an illness but said it could also be his teeth or stasis (blockage). She said in order to diagnosis him they would need to put him under and get xrays of everything and then do blood work. We signed him over and left..only to get the sad phone call a few hours later that he went into cardiac arrest after being put under anesthesia.Β  :( She came to the conclusion that she thinks he had cancer and that’s why he stopped eating. Soo..we lost our little blue lop way too early. He broke our hearts when he left us and will always have a piece of it. Our hamster Crinkles followed him 6 days later on Monday from cancer as well (he had a tumor and was too tiny to operate on). Another little cutie that will always have a piece of our hearts. Now it’s just Ryan, me, a maltese, a turkish van and a fishie. Hopefully they won’t be leaving us anytime soon! <3

(Oh..and my wordpress was hacked. I spent all afternoon/night Saturday reinstalling and fixing it. Lesson learned? Always keep wordpress up to date. Theend.)

Must fit in more cardio…check!

January 8, 2009

Just finished biking for an hour! I need to try to fit biking into my “off” days when I get a chance for extra calorie burn. Generally I jog Mon, Wed and Fri for at least an hour..so there need to be more biking on Tuesdays, Thursdays and the weekends. With the holidays I’ve gained a couple pounds so that makes me farther from my wedding weight goal. Wherever I can fit in additional calorie burn..the better! I just have a hard time fitting workouts in lately with all the blogs and work I have to keep up with. Ugh. Why can’t there be more time in a day? And why does it take under a minute to eat a tasty morsel and 10-15 minutes of exercise to burn it off? Meh!

BTW – I found a delicious cheeseburger/patty melt recipe online yesterday and I’m going to try to throw it together for dinner (in as healthy a way as possible!). If it’s good I’ll make sure to share!

Holidays are over, back to the usual!

January 5, 2009

I can’t believe how quickly time flew the past month and a half! Now the holidays are over and I have to go back to the usual schedule of working on websites and blogs, cleaning the house and my craft business. I must say I am relieved the holidays are over because they are so hectic..but I also hate returning to the day to day life afterwards. I get spoiled by having Ry around more since he gets vacation days for the holidays..and I also have to force myself to go back to being more strict with my diet and exercise. It’s way too easy to splurge and pretend the diet doesn’t exist when everyones eating cookies and turkey dinners. I’m forcing myself to be good now though because yesterday was the 6 month mark to the wedding and I want to be in shape for theΒ  big day! Ugh..I’m gonna miss all the goodies though. Poo!

Well I have 2 blogs to get out today and a cardio workout..and I’d love to get them all done before lunch..so here we go!

Engagement party and my stupid laptop.

September 24, 2008

Oh, hello there! An update..yippee! Not really. I’m pretty boring! So what’s new on the lilly front? Not much..just having our engagement party get together this weekend..SOoo, I’m planning for that amid the normal muck of everyday life.

We are having a small gathering at our house Saturday afternoon as sort of an engagement party. Basically, we are finally getting both of our parents (and step-parents) into one place, so they can finally meet each other. We figured this would be a nice beginning to a long list of wedding festivities and to-dos, and we also figured it would make things less awkward ont he big day if everyone had already met and talked previously. So long as everyone gets along I guess! We aren’t doing anything big – just a small barbeque of burgers and hot dogs, some homemade baked beans and baked desserts. If everyone feels up to it we may also head to the wedding venue to show them where we will be saying our I dos. Should be fun! The cleaning and prepping the house beforehand..eh..not so much.

I’m also back on a more strict diet on weekdays like I was doing a year ago when I lost the first 10-12 pounds. The wedding day is approaching a lot faster than we thought it would..so I know I need to get back in gear now to be the petite bride I am hoping to be. Don’t get me wrong, I’m pretty small and in shape now..but I like how my face looks better (more defined?) when I’m 135-140lbs..so I want to lose at last 5-10 pounds in the next 9 months. I’m starting now because I know the colder weather holidays are coming upon us now..so if I focus on losing now it won’t be a big deal if I gain a couple during the holiday parties. (Makes it easier to lose everything after January 1st rolls around if I lost some before I pigged out!) So far it has only been a week or so, so nothing really in regards to weight change yet..but it’s a slow process so I’ll be patient. Not eating whatever I want sucks though, and makes me cranky. If I was granted wishes one would definitely be to be able to eat whatever I want, whenever I want..and still be tiny and in shape. It takes qay to long to exercise off 100 calories..compared to the minute or so it takes to consume them!

*Rant* Lastly, my laptop is stupid. It always loses it’s wireless internet connection and sometimes won’t even open firefox. I broke down and reinstalled windows on it today thinking it would solve my problem, but it is not plug and play at all (or fast for that matter..256 mb ram?? UGH!)..so it still needs working internet drivers that don’t suck. The dell support site has about 102 different drivers for networking..Which one do I use turdnuts at dell? Could you be any less helpful? I finally found and installed one that will connect to internet..but it takes about 2 minutes to load each page, regardless of being on a cable connection. Fuck you laptop. I hate you. I have a million things to do on my blogs and web businesses, and I’m forced to sit on my desktop in the basement because despite spending 6 hours on the laptop, it still acts like a piece of splooge. WHen the wedding is over and we pay off our debt..I NEED an up to date laptop…and a couch. Our couch is also a bumpy lumpy turd. *huff*

And I’m off!

Almost April…

March 31, 2008

It’s almost April! April is generally when the weather finally breaks here in Western NY, and starts actually feeling like Spring. I can’t wait! Tomorrows going to be a bit above average and actually make it into the 60s…I’m hoping to get a walk or run in the fresh air! It sucks being cooped up inside for 5 months every year..it’s always exciting when the weather warms up again.

Speaking of warming up..bikini season is just around the corner and I’ve recently weighed in at 143.2. Yay! Still going strong. 17 pounds lost now! I was in a plateau for awhile ( a few weeks) but kept doing what I’ve been doing and it eventually broke and started dropping again a week or so ago. Starting tomorrow I am going to be adding a lot more toning to my schedule. I’m almost where I want to be weight wise so all I need now is to tighten up a few places and drop the remaining 3-5 pounds and I’m set. I’m excited I’ll be able to pull on my swimsuit this year for Ontario Beach Park and not feel uncomfortable in my own skin.

On another note, I haven’t been feeling so great the past week or so healthwise. I’m been experiencing a ton of dizziness and nausea. I tend to deal with it every month or 2 since highschool..but the past week it’s been almost non-stop and seems to worsen if I turn my head left or right for any longer than 10-15 seconds. Over the years I’ve experienced the dizziness and symptoms in a multitude of ways. Sometimes the dizziness is accompanied by chest pain (I had some sharp ones last night which basically drew the last bit of energy I had in me for the day), and other times it just comes on suddenly and I have a “drop-attack” where I suddenly feel really sick, vision starts to blur and fade out, sounds fade out and I drop to the ground, sweating reallly, really badly. I had cardio tests done years ago and was told I have Mitrovalve prolapse and although the tests didn’t say for sure, they -thought- I also had neurocardiogenic syncope..but noone knows for sure. I finally made an appointment to meet with a local doctor in a month to begin having regular visits again, and hopefully get some bloodwork and tests done to really find out what my problem is. Does anyone experience anything I explained and know what it is? I’ve been dealing with it forever and noone seems to ever have answers, and now that it seems to be getting worse lately I need to really push for some answers. I’ll keep everyone updated, hopefully it’s something minor that I can manage and not anything too severe :/

Friday Workout..Check!

February 29, 2008

Completed todays workout.. Yay! I strapped on my Timex heart rate monitor, and to change things up a bit ran around the house..keeping my heart rate between 136-175 bpm. Just something to break the workout boredom until I can run around outside! I ran up and down the stairs..jogged figure eights…side shuffled..skipped..anything to keep my heart up. My legs feel great πŸ˜€ I have been in a bit of a plateau lately, stuck around 146-148 lbs..but I’m almost at the point now where I’m toned enough where the weight doesn’t matter so much. Sure, I wanna lose another 10 pounds if I can..but I think I’d feel comfortable pulling on a bikini now. I need to get back to drinking 8 glasses of water a day, start taking my vitamins more regularly again..and fit more toning exercises in throughout the week for my stomach and my butt. I’m already excited for summer! Ontario Beach Park here I come! :)

Site stuff –

  1. I need to figure out how to get my WordPress plugin working to embed flash videos into the blog. I have the crap all installed..but for some reason it doesn’t work right when I try to embed things.
  2. I need to set up my gallery. I have the database all saved from the last host..I just need to figure out how to move it over.
  3. I need to set up the Portal. Like the gallery..need to figure out how to import!

On another note..I reallllly want to have some Astronaut Ice Cream. Please?

Btw..Zoe pooped in the house this morning..Grr. Makes me so mad! Oh..and Tutter(rabbit) celebrated his 3rd birthday yesterday. So cute!

Feeling better… :)

February 8, 2008

Well I’m feeling better today than I was a couple days ago. The wedding stuff is a little less overwhelming now that we are unexpectedly getting a lot more back in taxes this year than expected (more than 3X what we got last year)..so that’s HUGE for paying off debts and making room for wedding deposits. We are hoping to set a date and make a deposit on the venue we want within the next 2-3 months. Yay! I’m planning the wedding all on my own at this point since I’m home and can set time aside to figure everything out. Right now, I think I’m planning for blue and green for colors, with the main flower being hydrangeas..one of my favs πŸ˜€ We shall see how it all goes!

I’m also making progress on the weight loss front, down this week to 146.4, so about another pound gone and I’m finally starting to fit back into my skinny jeans πŸ˜€ My right knee has been acting up since I biked on Wednesday, so I did a power walk on the treadmill today for 45 minutes instead of jogging. Even that was a bit painful..but I won’t work out again till Monday and I splurgggge on weekends..so I needed to get something in. Slooowly but surely. I should be in bikini shape by May, weeee.

I’m heading into Binghamton this weekend to visit Ry’s parents. Leaving tonight and returning on Sunday. It’ll be the first time seeing them since getting engaged on New Years so I’m excited to show them the ring and talk to them about our plans.

That’s about it on the Lilly front :) Once my hair dries I’m going to snap a few cam pics and update the cam image. Give me about an hour or 2! πŸ˜€

Just Me..

January 24, 2008

Hmmn..how did my picture/site become first in google image search for cam girls? It’s my big smiling face and then a bunch of nudies..hehee. Word.

So, I’m procrastinating. I decided I need to do some cleaning today. not the usual pick up round the house..do dishes..laundry cleaning. I’m pullin’ out the big guns today. Oh yes. My shark steamer is totally gonna kick my kitchen and bathroom floor’s ass. My dog is too curious and has an intelligence of -2 though, so I’;m sure she’ll get in the way and make the process a pain.

I’ve further succeeded in my weight loss goals, I weighed in yesterday at 147.6 πŸ˜€ YaY! I also took measurements and I’m now at 32c-27-37..so in total I’ve lost 4 inches around hips and 3 around waist..just a couple more on each and I’m ready for bikini weather in 5-6 months..I couldn’t be more on track. Wweoeeoooo. I think these are so cute!

My Run is Done, yay.

January 21, 2008

Well I just finished my run for today..so I need to shower! Feels good though! I did an old routine on the treadmill I used to do about a year and a half ago where I slowly increase incline to max and then back down over a span of 20 mins..and then flat out jog the remaining 25 minutes. Managed about 3.2 miles, all at some kind of incline. I want to work this back into my workout schedule more often, as I was using this most of the time when I was in my best shape in June 2006. Slowly but surely I -will- get back to that phyiscally, hopefully by summer!

When Ry and I bought our house and moved up to Rochester I quit my job in Buffalo and it really did a number on me physically to have a complete change in environment and schedule. Working from home I picked up bad habits of eating unhealthy big portions every meal of the day and then I was too consumed in working online, taking care ofmy new emo puppy and..*couch* playing MMORPG’s..*cough* to workout. Long story short, over a year I ended up putting on almost 20 pounds. 160. OUCH! Yes. I’m not going to be one of those girls who fake it in their profiles because they are embarrassed to admit their weight. Not gonna name any names. But ya πŸ˜‰ I am what I am, you get what you see. I know I’m not fat, but I definitely gained too quickly over one years time and was just unhealthy. I’ve gotten better though, I’m now at 148 and still losing!

Since October I’ve gotten back on track. For the past 3 and a half months I’ve lost 12 pounds of what I gained by simply by adding workouts back into my schedule 3-4 days a week (usually Mon, Wed, Fri..sometimes Sat), and watching what I eat on weekdays..sticking to 1200-1700 calories a day. (No more nightly sundaes! lol) I’m too huge a foodie to just diet every single day..so on weekends I loosen up the reigns a bit and allow myself to eat some of the things I don’t allow myself to have during the weekdays..a hot dog.. some takeout, a big bowl of ice cream..Yum! I’d go crazy if I couldn’t eat some of the yummy junk I love at least at some point during the week. Hey, it’s working! Maybe not as quickly as if I was to stick to it every day..but 12 pounds is a huge loss for me (about a pound a week), and I’m happy. My goal weight is to be around 135-140 (which is perfect for my height, 5’8″-5’9″). I just want to fit back into my sz 4 denim mini for summer. I know I’ll never be a size zero..but I don’t want to be! Working out has made me gain lean muscle in so many places, especially my legs…that there’d be nooo way I’d ever manage to be that tiny without losing my muscle. I was size zero when I was “skinny-fat”, not eating a ton and never working out. I prefer the more fit me πŸ˜€ 10-15 more pounds lost by summer..and sexy bikinis! That is my goal. Huzzah!